Just want to ramble a bit..

Yup, ramble, not rant. Definitely not rant! So... I noticed that on here, as I'm typing this out, the font looks like Times New Roman, so I always change it to veranda, but then yesterday, I forgot to change it to veranda, and it looked normal and not TNR like on the post... does it look like TNR for you or just normal? Hmmm...

So, I'm still so confused about what to do for next year. I must admit, I've hit a small period of no motivation, it sort of sucks. I can't seem to spit out anything good for my papers, I have one due tomorrow that I've written twice, but deleted all of it both times because it isn't up to my standards. Ugh. I hate having standards, a) it means I wont ever be satisfied with the love of my life (just kidding, I threw that one in for fun), and b) it means that times like this threaten my academic life. Boo on Nana teaching me to have standards!

I just had to move outside of my room because my internet went funky, I don't know what's up with it these days! But yeah, so school wise I'm currently like that little duckling in the picture you always see, you know the one I'm talking about, the cute little duckling that can't get up the sidewalk curb like all of it's little duckling friends. Yup, that's the one. And yes, I'm tired. I'm listening to Indescribable, and although I originally really didn't like the song, I think it's become one of my favorites, mainly because over time I actually listened to the lyrics, and wowsa, they're amazing!

Anyhow, back to my lack of life goals, haha: So, I think I've decided that I'll be doing the second semester of Briercrest classes, that way I can take a few of the courses here that I REALLY want to take, and I can audit the second half (aka the fluent half) of the German course, and then I'll have it really down-pact, and THEN I can spend the year in Germany! How cool would that be? It would also allow me to have ample time to save up a lot of money (because Bible school is a money-blackhole) and stuff too, possibly buy a vehicle! I really need a vehicle...

Also, now that I'm turning 20, my parents are beginning to do the ever so loving "get life plans" thing, where I'm supposed to begin thinking about where I'll live next year (no worries though, I've got that one figured out, so hmph), where I'll be working, what I'll be doing, what I'll be driving, who I'll be engaged to (my dowry is getting old and rickety... soon the dear little goat will be giving powdered-milk!), etc. Oh life. Anyhow... although they haven't said it straight out, the pressure is there all the same. Maybe it's just my subconcious telling me to get a life? I dunno. I know I need to accept the "adult" responsibilities of life and such, but still, I don't want to be some cranky old adult. I officially can't claim that 19 is still a teen because it ends with the word teen (it's been my excuse so far) because twenty doesn't have it! It doesn't even have an extra 'e' so I could say that the word teen is hidden in it! *sigh*

Anyhow... other than that life is good, well, except for the lack of motivation and incoming slaughterhouse of exam periods and stuff. Not to mention the thought of losing my freshman TWENTY over the summer, gah... I put on twenty pounds, I weigh 130! ONE HUNDRED AND THIRTY POUNDS! But no worries, I'm not obsessing ;).

Love ya'll!

SERVE Conference::

Well, it really wasn't all that interesting, and I don't entirely feel changed, then again, the courses were slightly toned down and made as simple as possible, and a lot of older people with terrible jokes were the speakers. Unfortunately I was also really tired after watching all of Season 3 in about 2 days (gilmore girls ofcourse!)... *sigh* I'm so proud of our dear Rory for graduating, though I've seen that episode quite a few times over the years thanks to the lovely re-runs provided on tv!

Anyhow, the main speaker was funny, made rather "rash" jokes which I muchly appreciated, seriously folks, Christianity is NOT a serious thing! Anyhow.. I liked that his main point was that God came to do 3 things, I only remember the third one, and that is to "end religion". Hurrah for SOMEONE understanding God, yeesh, I get so bored of speakers coming in and making a big whoo-hah over "religion this and that" when in the Bible it never speaks in a good tone about religion. We need God, not religion fellas!

I just typed anyhow again, but figured I shouldn't use that to start my sentence. Um... yeah, so. Another cool thing the guy talked about was this: God could have made us at any time in the history of the world, but he made us now. He made us now, to impact the people we meet and he has us come into contact with now, because he wants us to, now. I thought it was cool and something to think about.

But alas, I have a LOT of work to do, only about 3 weeks until I'm all finished here, it's so sad :(. I have some papers (haha some.... I wish..) to finish and start, so I'm off!

Snowboarding on a MOUNTAIN!!!

Right, so, I just got back. I left Thursday night with Mel, Jenice, and Hannah (I didn't really know Hannah before, but she's incredibly cool and funny, she can also spend an entire day falling and still look hot, I don't understand it) to head out to Calgary. We were planning on getting in by 2:30 am but got there at 5am, I didn't care, I had been sleeping, lol. Anyway, we stayed at Mel's cousin's place, to say the least, they essentially live in the richest area, are ridiculously rich, have cute dogs, cute kids, and a mansion. Oh yeah, the guy is a chef on the side, no joke, I haven't eaten food like that in my life, and he's going to make my wedding cake. Anyhow, more on the cake later.

So we got up early the next morning to go snowboarding (WOOOO) I'm tired, wired, and pumped. Meaning I was hyper out of my face and had random napping spurts. Anyhow, we got there, got our stuff together, went up the gondola, and were on a mountain (I was excited at this point). As if the beginning couldn't get any better, the guy at the boot rental thingy was A HOT IRISHMAN WHO LOVED FLIRTING!!! So I left with a huge smile, ready to take on the world.

I spent the next few hours on my butt. No joke, I fell more than I've ever fallen in my life. It was so much fun! Unfortunately, my bottom disowned me, but that's alright. After a couple of hours, I figured out how to plow backwards and forwards using the toe edge (just to point something out, it is a proven fact that snowboarding is HARDCORE harder than skiing, so don't laugh, it was bloody difficult!) and after that began learning how to go down a hill on the snowboard rather than my face.

By the end of the first day, I was partially able to carve, but I still fell constantly and took out little skiing children (they should be kept out of the way, seriously, the little dorks). I had an amazing time, and could no longer move properly by the time we got back into the truck. I loved it! I was bruised, had smashed all but a smidgen of my pride, and couldn't wait for more! We got back to the house (I essentially fell out of the truck as my legs werent working) and I had a much needed power nap and shower (I've never experienced hat hair like that in my friggen life!!!). Oh, and I had gotten to flirt more with said hot irishman before leaving, life is wonderful. Anyway, so the chef rich guy made us this AMAZING supper of (please keep in mind these were all made from scratch while I was napping) super soft and hot and amazing bread, and this honey/mango/curry chicken and pasta... I couldn't understand why my mouth was essentially having an orgasm (for lack of better description words :P) but wow, that man can cook!

We then went to bed completely exhausted (there was also shopping and snack excursions!). We got up really early 5:45 am the next day, got dressed (which was hard when your legs dont bend!) and headed out again. I slept on Mel, who was asleep but pushed me off anyway, apparently she's a touchy sleeper or something!) and we got there, went up the hill, and started our day! Once again I was greeted (nicely ;)..) by the hot irishman *sigh* and I headed out to conquer the world. I then spent the next hour or so on my bottom in complete frustration, and took out another little girl skiier (they really need to watch out!). Then Mel and Jenice (think YEARS of snowboarding experience) decided to give us another lesson, and suddenly... I GOT IT!

No joke, I was carving, and falling sooo much less. They took me to some tougher hills, and I was able to do them! I mean, at one point I flew into the air and literally landed face first hard enough so shut off my ipod which was on hold (meaning nothing you do will turn it off... yes, it was an ouch moment) but whooo dang! And by the end of the day, I was having no problem. Want to hear the best part???

I WENT DOWN A BLACK DIAMOND HILL WITHOUT FALLING!!! So here's the story for that one: I went up the strawberry hill (it's a green run for beginners) because I wanted to go down one I could for sure handle and stuff and go really fast on without falling, and when I got to the very top of the mountain, the wind was INSANE. It had started to snow, and you could literally not see a thing. I was completely snowblind, or whatever you call it. So I couldnt see the markers telling me where to go (dun dun dunnn) and I ended up missing my turn and flying down a black diamond hill. Yes, I almost crapped my pants. No, I didn't fall, I got it under control with a nice little backwards plow, then just did my thing! There were twists and turns and a hill, but I soon realised that if I continued down that hill, I'd die, haha, so I saw what appeared to be a trail leading to the big hill that went to the lodge. Sooo.. I went, and the next thing I know, I'm flying off a cliff. So, the "little path" lead to these rocks that the hardcores used to do big jumps. Yes, I went off of a little cliff, luckily there was a big wad of powder for me to land in, otherwise I'd have broken something for shizzle, lol. But yeah... I then continued down, excited and in pain, and we headed out (after another nice conversation and some "help getting my ever-so-tight-and-hard-to-get-off-oneself's-boots" with the hot irishman, I seriously took a liking to that guy). But the next day the conditions were uber sucky so we decided just to leave and come back early.

During the stay in Calgary I went to my first (and definitely not my last!) Krispy Kreme, had the best donut of my life, saw sooo many hot guys, got chased by weird east-indian guys who thought we were hitting on them (long story short: we were in McDonalds, I went onto the window ledge and made a sexy pose for a picture, Hannah winked at the guys who were gawking at my pose, and they decided to chase us... they didn't catch us!), had the best meals ever, etc etc etc.

I had the time of my liiiiiiife! And I'm now going to start snowboarding more often, I really like it!

PS: I might be in Germany for next year.

Thoughts on Henry James:

I've been reading the classical novel "Portrait of a Lady" by Henry James, and though it was somewhat tedious and hard to get through at first, I've honestly come to love it! He has this way of taking the smallest detail and making it shine, and has such an amazing respect for his characters, especially Madame Merle and Isabel, it's fascinating to see what he does with them! I personally think he's got a thing for the ever so headstrong M. Merle, but maybe that's just me looking too much into things? Anyhow, it's a beautiful novel once one gets further into it, and I strongly suggest it to anyone who wants to read in bits and pieces, though some will take an hour or so per "piece".

Other than that, life in Caronport has been somewhat boring lately. I find myself going on walks constantly, as it's beautiful weather outside, nice and breezy, and moist with the promise of rain, though we never get it, lol. I've decided that I want to climb onto the roof of the outside laundry building, it's old and rickety, but I swear, it has footholds in the walls! I'll do it at night dressed in black, and take pictures to show my triumph... except I wont be able to show them incase anyone sees and I get into trouble of some sort. I don't want to do an hour of toilet cleaning with the janitor ladies :(.

I've decided that I only want to do 2 years here. So after next year, I think I might find a good job, start an apartment, and save money, do some writing, and finally get started on my travel plans. It would be a nice break, and then I can get a lot done and decide where I want to finish my years of studying. Then again, this idea may wear off soon and leave me back where I was before with the thought of continuing in the TESOL program or overall Global Studies. I'm just not satisfied in the way that I'm supposed to be learning all about the wide, vast, amazing world, and instead am sitting in Pentateuch class. Yes the other things are teaching me a lot of new information about the Bible and myself and the God I serve, but I want to know more about the world! That's what TESOL and global studies are all about! So I think I'll take the classes that focus more into that, and then spend a year abroad, and then find a school where the things that I want to learn are taught. We'll see.

I've decided that I know why God brought me here this year. I think it was to make me realise that I needed him, and really wasn't a Christian before this year. After coming here, I went through a crisis in which I realised that I didn't have God. I lived the life, but it was living under my parents' faith, not my own. And so now I've learned to take that faith and make it my own, and grow in and under God, and just surrender my life to Him. Yes it's still a battle in action, but I've learned so much that I never would have anywhere else. It was because I came here that I became a real, knowledgable, true Christian. And I'm so thankful for it!

Anyway, I suppose that's enough for now. The allergy medicine is clicking in and I'm sort of feeling "out of body-ish". G'night!

Jazz that goes down smooth, like chocolate ;)

I'm not entirely sure why I wanted that as a title... but eh, it's true, I like my jazz, I like it quite a lot. It's almost the only thing I listen to nowadays, thanks to Joanna -all that forcing it on me, and she still couldn't stop me from preferring the types she didn't like- unless I randomly want something else!

Anyway, I'm thinking of applying to be a live-in on the highschool dorm (which is attached to Whit) next year. Apparently the college girls who choose to live over there get to make a big difference in their lives, and just set a great example and help to make them feel loved and part of a family, rather than like they're at a boarding school... which the highschool kids here are. I think it would be a pretty great thing, I get along with younger people, but know where to draw the line, and love the thought of setting an example and getting to interact and be a godly inspiration for them. I mean, I've always had younger friends, and I love them all to bits, haha. I don't have problems getting along with people, and I can handle noise levels (so long as I get quiet time now and again). I'm going to pray about it and talk to Terry and Jenn to see what they think, this could be a pretty cool idea!

I wrote two papers in two and a half hours yesterday, normally it takes like a week to get a paper written decently, but I dunno, I just totally zoned into them, and the next thing I know I had finished them both, cited everything properly, and reading over them, written some damn good papers! Haha. So that makes life nice and easy. Tonight I have to attend a lecture from the President of the American Chesterton Society, apparently he tries to be funny and is wickedly intelligent. But as it's for Christian Worldviews, and Sean Davidson's idea of funny differs greatly from that of the average person... chances are I'll only be impressed by his intelligence, and not his lack of humour!

Anyway, just wanted to give a teensy update! Love ya'll!

PS: Listen to Stiched Up by Herbie Hancock feat. John Mayer, it's amazing!

First post in March!

Well, I guess technically I have a lot to say after my week at home... so I'll sort of give you guys an ever so exciting rundown on it all!

Firstly, I spent the day in Winnipeg with Tiff Lazar (lifeguard from Simonhouse) and had a great time. I got to do some much needed shopping, and spend a few hours at her dorm house (the guy who owns it is an artist and it's like living in a travel themed art museum, it's just too cool!). I also got to sit on a bus and ride it aimlessly for over an hour, something I've always wanted to do! So I get to scratch something off of my "before I die" list... yes! Then I got onto the bus for Thompson, it was packed. P-A-C-K-E-D! They even had to send people back to wait for the next morning's bus! So it smelt, and was loud, and I fell asleep and didn't care at all until we got to Thompson!

THEN I got to see my new house for the first time... it was sort of exciting, going home but not knowing where I lived :P. As we pulled onto the street, I definitely started laughing at this one house that stuck out from the others because it was a bright teal colour... sort of a barf blue. And then we pulled into it's driveway. Haha. Oh life, I adore you. Anyway, I like it, it's set up nicely, a little bit cold, but eh, it's Thompson, right? So I got to sleep for a bit, and wash up to remove the stinky bus smell! Then I went shopping at Giant Tiger to buy ugly tacky clothes that were on sale for really cheap! I bought a zebra costume for a baby... yup. And I looked darn hot in it too! Mind you, I had to cut it into seperate pieces in ordere to wear it, but you get the idea. Maybe I'll post pictures on facebook!

We wore our tacky outfits to the Youth Group that night, where I was introduced to the new Youth pastor couple... they're PERFECT! Musical, young/newlyweds, ANNNNNND the wife LOVES Gilmore Girls! God is SOO good, lol. He made us wait, yes, but then WHAM-O life gets awesome! I love them and can't wait to get to know them a bit more when school's out. (Rabbit trail #1 - I can't believe I'm done school in 6 weeks.. what the chotch is up with that!). But they were a ton of fun, and looked at me with the look that said (remember I'm wearing tacky clothes with an 8-month old's zebra costume a-top them "when we have kids, she is kept far away". But that's ok... they'll warm up to me, they always do :P.

The rest of the week was pretty good too, I got to sit in on Band class and Choir, sit in on Mr. Audets gr.11 comp class AND READ SHAKESPEARE! It was definitely a highlight for me, lol. I also got to whisper all the answers, *sigh* I love Shakespeare! Anyway... this is a rabbit trail in and of itself!

I talked to Debbie and realised that if I left thursday night (it was thursday night that I talked to her, lol) I could make it into Brandon right ontime to see her and a few people, so I hopped onto the bus. Now, things get interesting. We had to stop and turn back after abou 45 minutes because we realised we didnt have enough fuel to get to Winnipeg. AND the bus was cold enough that my lips/fingers went blue and I could see my breath. No joke, the coach couldn't maintain heat, and the bus sent to meet us from Winnipeg took it's sweet time. Haha. Needless to say, I was one of the few people who both got on and off the bus healthy, whereas the rest were coughing and sneezing and unhappy with their newly aquired colds (suckers!).

At Brandon I got to meet/hang out with Debbie's friends. It's Joyce's birthday on Sunday (I believe) and so we took her out for supper, and later on to go dancing at a bar. I got to go to a bar! It's been so long since I got to dance it up, so I had a great time. No worries, I stayed sober, lol. But seriously... it was just SO great to be able to dance around and have a great time. Apparently my moves have gotten a bit better though, because I (and a guy who was dancing with me and her friends) got to go up onto the stage beside the Dj and work it! Haha, it was pretty fun. The guy later brought up this conversation after a few hours of dancing and picture taking:
Hot guy: "So... I have a hotel room.."
Myself (with a sexy face on, hehe, just for emphasis and a laugh for myself!) :"Really? Well, I hope it has a t.v. hotty, because I'm not like that ;).."

It was pretty funny, lol. He was a nice guy though, and a pretty sweet dancer! He did the white boy breakdance moves, lol, too funny! Anyway, after that, I got onto a bus and came home to Caronport. It was a looong ride, but eh, I was so tired I slept through most of it anyway! So yes, I had some fun adventures and essentially an amazing week! Now it's back to midterms and final papers that are all due, CRAP!